Happy Cinco De Mayo

Hello everyone, I’m currently locked down in edits for my second YA/MG book Evanescent and if my editors find out I actually took the time to blog they’d probably have my head, but I couldn’t resist coming out to wish everyone a happy Cinco De Mayo.

Some of the people who read this blog might know that I spent four years during grad school in southern New Mexico and I basically miss it every day. Especially on days like Cinco de Mayo. Why you ask. Here’s my top five reasons to miss New Mexico
1.) Sunshine.
2.) Hatch Green Chilis
3.) Palm trees
4.) White Sands
5.) Sunshine. Lots and lots of pretty warm sunshine.

Oh well, back into the breach once more for me. Have a good week everyone!

The Hero Always Seems To Get Short Shifted


So I’ve moved on to editing the series that I’ve been working so diligently on writing here recently—hopefully I’ll have good news on the publishing front with that sometime in the future—and I’ve started thinking about what I want to write next. I have one story that is already all plotted out that I’m working on but then the inevitable question comes of what’s next? So I’m churning ideas around in my head, listening to potential heroines bicker about why their storyline should come next, asking my friends on facebook to send me pictures of pretty men, and I realized my poor heroes. I really have turned them into over-sexualized plot devices that are tailor made to fit the needs of the heroine’s growth arc. I put their needs second to her’s because in my mind it’s always the heroine who speaks first and he comes along later to complement her. Sure, eventually they will have needs and inner wounds and emotional scars but in the beginning they really start out as a pretty face, fabulous abs, and a bum you sort of want to sink your teeth into. Then I layer in the emotions and all the angst to fit my fabulous heroine’s needs and try to short cut my way into getting my hero naked and on his back.

That’s when it hit me, I am the romance writer version of a frat boy. And I should be deeply ashamed of myself for it. But then again they are fictional so it’s not like I’ve repressed them or anything. And I am fully aware that real, living, breathing men are more than fabulous abs and pretty smiles that need to be stripped down and tied up so that women can have their wicked way with them. So I guess it all comes out okay. To misquote Jessica Rabbit—I’m not bad, I just write that way.

I’ve Agreed to What May Possibly Be the Biggest Mistake of My Life

Two weeks before the release of my first MG/YA book The Chronicles of Nerissette: Everlast I’ve agreed to take my kids to the World’s Most Horrible Place for Rational Adults—aka the Happiest Layer of Hell—Disney World. For a week. A week of lines, screaming children, and people in costumes who are way too pleasant before my sixth cup of morning coffee.

So, if you don’t hear from me after August everyone knows what happened. Mickey Mouse and his crew of miscreant small mammals have taken me prisoner and nailed my feet down in that damn It’s A Small World ride. Please come find me.

And while they’re doing that can someone else please resuscitate my bank account because I don’t know if you know this but apparently the Happiest Place on Earth is one of the most freaking expensive as well.

Dear Weather Gods: Can We Please Have Some Consistency…Please?

Not really an earth shattering blog or anything but I’ve seen a lot of other authors complaining about the same thing—we need some consistent weather please. Please. Please.
I don’t know about where anyone else is from but here in crazy PA the weather has been bouncing between utterly freezing, to soaking wet but not freezing but still cold, to downright nice. Usually hourly.
And being a cranky writer – more like a big baby according to my hubby—I just want nice pretty mid summer weather. Not too hot, not at all cold, and sunshine all day long. So if anyone’s got a dial on where I could get that could you send it along please?

What about ya’ll? Is the weather driving you mad where you’re at?

Sunshine Award

The Sunshine Award is given to bloggers who “positively and creatively inspire others in the Blogosphere”. Isnt’ that so lovely. I’m not sure I actually do that but the lovely Jane Beckham (http://janebeckenham.com/blog/) gave it to me so I’m going to go for it. Besides, I don’t have anything else to write about today.

Here are the Sunshine Award rules:
1) Thank the person who presented you with the award and link them in your blog post.
2) Do the Q and A that comes with the award (see below).

So without further ado here’s the Q&A of more than you really probably want to know about me:

Q and A:

Favourite Colour: Purple although red is a close second.

Favourite Animal: elephants. I once got to play with a baby elephant and just sort of fell in love with them.

Favourite Number: 7

Favourite Non-Alcoholic Drink: Unsweetened Ice Tea but there are days that those go alcoholic too with the help of Sweet Caroline vodka

Facebook or Twitter: I have a facebook that updates to twitter because I’m lazy.

My Passion: History. I have such a weird fascination with it that I actually considered studying it for a while instead of math and economics– I probably should have followed that instinct actually

Getting or receiving presents: Giving defintely. I always feel weird receiving.

Favourite Day of the Week: Saturday– it’s the day I take off each week.

Favourite Flower: Stargazer Lilies

Self Aware Alpha Males

So right now I’m getting ready to go on blog tour with Candace Havens and Lily Lang to promote our new steampunk anthology from Entangled Publishing (A Riveting Affair) and while I was prepping for that I saw another post by Michelle McLean about Protective Heroes and how she loves fictional alpha males. And I got to thinking. And that led to a big realization on my part.

I don’t like the typical alpha males. I really, really don’t. In fact most of the romance novels I’ve thrown across a room in the past few years have involved alpha males. Case in point? I never made it any further in Twilight than the sneaking in the window bit and I wanted to put the book through a shredder.

I can’t stand big protective guys who sends bodyguards or stalks a heroine “for her own good” and doesn’t think “wow I need to go out and get a hobby, or possibly spend some time in therapy. A lot of time in therapy.”

I’m not saying I don’t like a man who can stand up for himself or for a woman for that matter. I do. I really do. Ask all the nice men who I ground into the dirt during what my girlfriends called my uniform phase. I like muscles and tattoos and a guy who knows his way around a tank. (I have friended Men in Uniform on Facebook where these yummy gentlemen came from and am not ashamed to admit it.) But being honest with myself—what all the guys in my uniform phase had in common besides bulging muscles, tattoos and uniforms was one thing—they all had brains. And they respected that I had them as well.

Or as the nice police officer I dated during that phase put it. “I gave you a can of mace, I taught you how to drop an attacker, you’re going five blocks in a safe neighborhood, why should I come pick you up from work when I could be here making you dinner instead?” Trust me, he was right—guy made a killer Chicken Piccata. I mean seriously it should have been illegal it was that good. And I always made it home perfectly safe while we together — without him once coming to escort me home.

So that’s what I want in a fictional alpha male. To be evolved enough to know that my ovaries don’t make me weak and in need of protection.

That’s the one place that we as romance writers can take a clue from reality. We can write guys who are tough and strong and sexy as hell but have evolved beyond caveman sensibilities when it comes to women. We can write the same types of men that we are raising our sons to be and our daughters to want. And we can give all men—fictional or otherwise—the respect that they deserve by not writing them as caricatures.

Not every romance novel of course—because not everyone will agree with me and they’ll like their cavemen but as far as I’m concerned the cavemen knights in shining armor trope can go the way of amnesia babies and raping her till she loves me tropes. Which is completely off my reading and writing list.

Happy Easter Everyone!

Wherever you are, whatever you celebrate—I hope you have a happy Sunday filled with warmth, sunshine, and enough chocolate to make your day wonderful.
Oh and check back soon for details on the Riveting Affairs Anthology press tour.



Actually it’s a short story in a steampunk anthology called Riveting Affairs with the wonderful Lily Lang and Candace Havens.
If you’re curious (and obviously why wouldn’t you be?) here are the blurbs for each of the stories and the buy link:
Lily Lang’s Beauty and the Clockwork Beast:
Rose Verney wants to fulfill her father’s dying request: to complete construction of the teleportation device he designed. Knowing just who can help her succeed, she seeks out Sebastian Cavendish, her father’s brilliant former student.
Sebastian hasn’t left his home since he returned from the Civil War. He’s a broken man, his prosthetics a reminder of the terrible destruction his inventions brought to the battlefield. He wants nothing to do with Rose and her father’s masterpiece, but when she barges into his abandoned lab and begins construction, it’s everything he can do to resist getting involved. Especially when she charms her way into his monstrous heart.

Candace Haven’s Demon Express
Professor Maisy Clark, professional demon hunter, is on the trail of an evil scientist responsible for the deaths of hundreds. Julian is worse than the monsters he creates, but he’s also obsessed with Maisy and willing to kill anyone who gets too close to her.

Just when she thinks she has Julian cornered, the sexy marshall Jake Calloway insists the investigation is his, and everything goes to hell. Maisy came to Texas to corner the scientist whose macabre experiments have taken so many lives, and Calloway is just another distraction she doesn’t need. Julian is her responsibility, one she’s not about to share. Even if Calloway can help, Julian will know Maisy is falling for the marshall, and she’s not willing to risk his life.

And my contribution — The Clockwork Bride
When engineer Aida Mulvaney attends a masquerade ball at the home of a staunch Luddite earl with a personal vendetta against her father’s company, she doesn’t expect to end the night married to the earl’s son Julian Capshaw, a brilliant engineer in his own right. The marriage will allow both of them to pursue their love of science, without interfering parents and ridiculous social stigmas. Though they escape to the Continent to start new lives, Julian’s father will have none of his heir’s disobedience. Before long, a marriage begun for the sake of convenience becomes a union of passion, but will it survive the machinations of an earl determined to destroy everything they love?

So spend the $2.99 and pick up two great stories and mine along with it. The buy links are below:

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/A-Riveting-Affair-ebook/dp/B00BY5XRHI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1364144279&sr=8-1&keywords=riveting+affair

Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/a-riveting-affair-candace-havens/1114883274?ean=9781622660643

Things Are Exceptionally Crazy Here

I’m counting down to the release of my new book– Devil May Care– on February 26th and things are amazingly hectic here in Casa Eimer. Since the beginning of the year I’ve done edits on a short story– Clockwork Bride in the Riveting Affair Anthology– finished line edits on Devil May Care and taken it through galleys, written one 65K manuscript, plotted 3 more, started another manuscript (3 chapters in! So yay me), and done the first pass edits for the first book in my 3 book YA series.

Meanwhile this great blog tour has been going on for Devil May Care while I try to unbury myself from work. You should all check it out. I’m giving away a bunch of free stuff and $50 amazon gift card.

So here is a list of all the stops: http://www.entangledinromance.com/2013/02/14/devil-may-care-blog-tour/
And here are the buy links to preorder it now or buy it when it comes out:
Buy links:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Devil-May-Care-Speak/dp/1620610876
B&N: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/devil-may-care-patricia-eimer/1108931502?ean=9781620610879